Dave Whiteman:I ate garbage last night, Barbara... and *loved* it!
Dave Whiteman:You could have pissed right here!
Barbara Whiteman:Dave, he did! He pissed all over the joint.
Doctor Von Zimmer:Has there been some recent change in living arrangements?
Barbara Whiteman:[flatly]We have a houseguest.
Doctor Von Zimmer:Oh.
[looks at Jerry]
Doctor Von Zimmer:How long are you staying?
Dave Whiteman:He's staying as long as he likes. And if the doggy doesn't like it, then the doggy can find other living arrangements.
Dave Whiteman:Would you like some wine, Al?
Al:No, thank you. This is one of my non-drinking days.
Dave Whiteman:Got a license?
Dave Whiteman:[hands him the keys]You drive.
Jerry Baskin:Okay. Where to?
Dave Whiteman:I don't know. Some days you just want to go, you know?
Jerry Baskin:Okay. Let's hit the beach. I got some friends down there.
Dave Whiteman:The beach?
Dave Whiteman:Who's going to run my business? Who's going to pay my bills? Who's...
Jerry Baskin:[interrupting]You got enough money to last *ten* lifetimes!
Dave Whiteman:[laughs heartily]Yeah... maybe *I* ought to become a bum. No job, no responsibilities...
Jerry Baskin:[snorts]You wouldn't last five minutes.
Dave Whiteman:You think so? Let's hit the beach, buddy. Pronto!
Dave Whiteman:Hey. You, uh, haven't said anything about the car.
Jenny Whiteman:It's nice.
Dave Whiteman:Yeah? You don't think it's, uh, too Beverly Hills?
Jenny Whiteman:Daddy, you work very hard for your money. You don't have to justify anything.
Dave Whiteman:I know, it's just that, you know... maybe I'm feeling a little guilty.
Jenny Whiteman:Guilt sucks.
Dave Whiteman:Max, I think it's time you stopped all this screwing around and started to learn the hanger business.
Max Whiteman:I don't like hangers.
Dave Whiteman:You don't like hangers? It's hangers that clothe you, and it's hangers that feed you!
Dave Whiteman:[Barb is visibly smashed]Hey, Barb?
Dave Whiteman:I thought we weren't going to drink any more.
Barbara Whiteman:Well, Dave, yeah. It's true. I *am* a vegetarian. But I hear... that vodka... comes from a potato!
Dave Whiteman:Oh, come on! The dog is running the whole house!
Dave Whiteman:Someone's pissing on my hydrangeas!