Nick Anderson:How's your interview?
Ashley Matthews:Don't ask.
Nick Anderson:Well, I already asked. I can't un-ask.
Ashley Matthews:Well, first, while I'm halfway through my shower the water goes out AGAIN. So I have to wash my hair out in Dash's water bowl, so I'm running late and I smell like dog-water. I get to my car and, of course, it doesn't start so I have to run and catch the bus and while I'm running I literally collide with some random guy, lose my phone so I don't get the call that the positions already been taken and I don't need to get on the bus to the interview I'm already late for.
Nick Anderson:[Chuckles]You washed your hair in dog-water.
Ashley Matthews:[Chuckles]I'm so glad you focus on the important things.
Will Price:It's less of a question, more of an invitation, um... do you wanna go out sometime?
Ashley Matthews:I don't think that's such a good idea.
Will Price:For you or for me? Or for both of us?
Ashley Matthews:Both of us. Yeah.
Will Price:Why is there something wrong with you?
Will Price:No-I'm, ha, that came out wrong. Um...
Ashley Matthews:Is there something wrong with you?
Will Price:That's a very valid point.
Will Price:Uh, you know in the interest of full disclosure I haven't had a girlfriend for six months and I'm kinda hostile towards women, plus my ex girlfriend she did a number on my head and -
[Ashley looks uncomfortable]
Will Price:I'm over-sharing.
Will Price:I sound a little pathetic here, don't I?
Ashley Matthews:Yeah, a little. But, you know, I'm probably worse so it's okay.
Will Price:Is that a yes?
Ashley Matthews:What? No! No, I... what's your angle?
Will Price:Angle? I don't have an angle. I just wanna take you out.
Will Price:Journalist. Modern Business Weekly.
Ashley Matthews:Oh. Never heard of it.
Ashley Matthews:How do you feel about Christmas?
Will Price:I LOVE Christmas.
Ashley Matthews:[Ashley looks annoyed]Okay. How do you feel about the Little Drummer Boy?
Will Price:Song or person?
Ashley Matthews:Person then song.
Will Price:Both needless.
Ashley Matthews:Okay. But if I'm gonna go out with you it has to be sooner than later.
Ashley Matthews:Because if not... I'll talk myself out of it.
Will Price:Okay, how about sometime next week?
Ashley Matthews:More like tomorrow?
Will Price:Oh! No, yeah, I can swing that. How 'bout around...
Will Price:Seven. Yeah, and, oh we can go over to...
Ashley Matthews:Right here?
[nods to restaraunt]
Will Price:I'll see you tomorrow. Huh.
Francine:You guys know each other?
Will Price:We go way back.
Ashley Matthews:We met yesterday.
Francine:[to Ashley]If I were you, I'd run.
Will Price:I think Ashley can decide for herself who she sees.
Ashley Matthews:Oh, I'm not seeing anyone.
Will Price:[digging in to chili]This looks good.
Ashley Matthews:I live for this stuff.
Will Price:[takes a bite]Mm, this is good. It's not really hot for 3 Alarm Chili.
Ashley Matthews:Give it some time.
Will Price:So how do you know Nick?
Ashley Matthews:Do you want me to see if he can have dinner with you?
Will Price:No. I'm sorry. It's just I get, I get curious and um-
[starts coughing as the chili kicks in]
Will Price:Holy cow this is hot.
Ashley Matthews:[Chuckling]Are you okay?
Will Price:Mm, it's just...
[gasping & coughing]
Will Price:How is your mouth not burning?
Ashley Matthews:You all right?
Will Price:[strained speaking]Yeah, no, I'm good. It's good chili, though.
Will Price:I'm gonna be honest with you, next time I'm totally ordering something different.
Ashley Matthews:3 Alarm Chili. You didn't think it would be hot?
Will Price:Good, I thought you'd object to a next time.
Ashley Matthews:I really thought you were interested in me.
Will Price:I am interested in you.
Ashley Matthews:You are more interested in the story.
Will Price:Can I not be interested in both?
Ashley Matthews:No. Because if you were interested in me you'd see why you shouldn't write this story.
Will Price:Can I ask you a few questions?
Nick Anderson:I wanna ask you a few questions.
Nick Anderson:Where you from?
Nick Anderson:Where'd you go to school?
Nick Anderson:You like writing?
Will Price:I love it.
Nick Anderson:You like Ashley?
Will Price:Ye-She's a very nice girl.
Nick Anderson:Nice girl. She's terrific.
Will Price:She's a little hardheaded.
Nick Anderson:Who isn't?
Will Price:Yeah. I like her.
Nick Anderson:She likes you. Otherwise she wouldn't have let you in as far as she has.
Will Price:You think so?
Nick Anderson:Oh yeah. Yeah.
Will Price:To be honest with you, sometimes she won't even look at me.
Nick Anderson:You're not very intuitive for a reporter are ya? The reason she won't look at you is she's afraid if she does... she'll melt.
Nick Anderson:No, I don't want you to keep Will waiting.
Ashley Matthews:He can wait.
Nick Anderson:How long are you going to keep him away?
Ashley Matthews:Uh, as long as possible.
Nick Anderson:Yeah, well you keeping waiting you're going to miss something special.
Will Price:Well, Nick said you didn't have a very normal childhood so...
Ashley Matthews:So you thought... sledding.
Will Price:Have you ever been?
Will Price:Well stop complaining and hop on.
Ashley Matthews:Um, is this thing safe?
Will Price:Of course. You ready?
Will Price, Ashley Matthews:It's your turn.
Will Price:I took him for a walk yesterday.
Ashley Matthews:Mm-hm. Then why are you getting up?
Ashley Matthews:[Dash enters bedroom wanting his morning walk and whining]Dash! I am not getting up until the alarm goes off.
[the alarm clock immediately sounds]
Ashley Matthews:Morning, Nick.
Nick Anderson:Morning, Ashley. Get your Christmas tree yet?
Ashley Matthews:[Chuckles]It's barely December.
Nick Anderson:Yeah, well. Nothing wrong with getting a jump start. Only comes once a year.
Ashley Matthews:So does hurricane season.
Francine:You selfish, conniving jerk!
Will Price:Francine! Good morning. I see we're picking up right where we left off.
Francine:You just can resist the chance to slander someone.
Will Price:Ooo, fancy lawyer talk. Actually, counselor, slander is verbal. Liable is written.
Francine:Fine. Liable. Don't get me sidetracked.
Will Price:Too easy.
Francine:Have you even heard one word I've said.
Will Price:Not really. I've gotten very good at tuning you out.
Will Price:Is Forcelink crying?
Bob:Do they have a reason to?
Will Price:[Smiling]Well, every time I write an article somebody cries.
Ashley Matthews:Hi, I'm Ashley Matthews. I have an interview with, um...
Law Office Receptionist:The positions been filled. We called you this morning.
Ashley Matthews:Oh, I don't-I don't think you did. Are-are you sure?
Law Office Receptionist:We called.
Ashley Matthews:Because I have my cellphone right here and I would've heard it ring...
Law Office Receptionist:Do you think arguing about this gonna change the fact that the jobs already taken?
Ashley Matthews:Mrs. Hendrix, I don't have any running water in my apartment and it seems to go out at the worst times.
Mrs. Hendrix:Oh, maybe it'll come back on again then.
Ashley Matthews:You know, I think the guy with my phone tried to ask me out.
Nick Anderson:Did you try to say yes?
Nick Anderson:I need you to take a walk.
Ashley Matthews:You're paying me to exercise?
Ashley Matthews:Have you seen this pile? It will take a fortune to help all these people. Where do you get the money?
[off his look she teases]
Ashley Matthews:You ARE dealing drugs.
Nick Anderson:I'll let you in on a secret. But you mustn't tell anybody.
Nick Anderson:I'm rich.
Ashley Matthews:How rich?
Ashley Matthews:If you're so rich why do you still live here?
Nick Anderson:Well a roof's a roof. I'm warm, I'm dry. I'm good.
Stan:What'll you have?
Will Price:Oh, um
[picks up menu then sets it down]
Will Price:You know what, I'll have whatever she's having.
Stan:[Stan and Ashley share a look. Then to Will:]Are you sure?
Will Price:[Uncertain]Uh, yeah?
Stan:Okay then. I'll get those right out to you.
Will Price:[to Ashley after Stan leaves]What are we having?
Ashley Matthews:Stan's 3 Alarm Chili.
Ashley Matthews:You're a real jerk, you know that?
Will Price:Yeah, I get that a lot.
Ashley Matthews:[to Will]I'm just making this up as I go so you'll have to wait and see.
Fast Food Restaraunt Guy:Can I help you?
Ashley Matthews:Yes, can I get fifty burgers To-go, please?
Fast Food Restaraunt Guy:Fifty?
Ashley Matthews:Five-zero, To-go.
Will Price:Is that Santa's list?
Ashley Matthews:Uh, yeah. And you're not on it.
Will Price:Oh! Neither are you.
Ashley Matthews:Grow up.
Will Price:We are in a toy store.
Nick Anderson:So how'd it go today?
Ashley Matthews:[hesitantly]Oh, you know. It went pretty good.
Nick Anderson:Pretty good?
Ashley Matthews:I don't know how to tell you this so I'm just gonna say it. Uh, that reporter you got a phone call about, the one who wants to write a story on you, and who I accidentally went out with, uh... he's helping me.
Nick Anderson:Well that's interesting.
Ashley Matthews:I couldn't do it alone. And he knows how it works now. He wants to interview you. I'm sorry. Nick, say something.
Nick Anderson:You like him, don't ya?
Ashley Matthews:Do not.
Will Price:It's okay.
Ashley Matthews:How is it okay?
Will Price:It's not. It's just something people say.